Today is the kind of day that
madmen rave on about in those
sparse moments of lucidity
before retreating once again
into the back of their minds
way back into that dark dark
place that beckons like a
midnight candy van
driving them once again to
begin screaming nonsensical statements
about government experiments
and Christ in a taco.

It is of the days that you wonder if you
could clear the front yard with your laptop
and would consider it quite possible
were you to spin around and
give it a good swing outward
setting it free
free to fly
like a bird from a prison
or a whispered wish from a child’s lips
though the window might slow it down
might
but you really don’t think so.

Today is like some hideous creature
that has crawled onto your back
and dug in
breathing it’s horrible scent into your face
and laughing while doing so.

It is the office people that you would
much rather not talk to but seem to always
have a keen sense of when you are going
to the bathroom and expertly plan to
intercept you in the hallway
in order waste long moments of your life
with boundless idiocy
especially when you have a project due
two hours ago.

Today is a rock for your window
it is the chattering salesman at the door
and the bullish bill collector on the phone
it is the alarm clock that will not shut off
even when unplugged
it is the hole in the boat
the tears on the orphan’s face
the hot boiling Hell that you feel
when nailed to a desk
like Christ on the cross
as the hours
laugh in your face.

Today is the kind of day
that has driven men mad
for thousands of years
and it has become fully apparent
that I am no exception.

No, I will not put down the match.

So…

how was your day?