Tag Archives: stupid

Buying My First Smartphone

“Here’s your new phone.”
“It’s looking at me funny!”
“That’s probably your own reflection.”
“Where are all the buttons?”
“It doesn’t have any.”
“What kind of witch-magic is this?!”

I gave the phone a shake.
Nothing happened.
Nothing came out.
All the witches must still be inside.
I shook it harder
then stuffed it down my pants.

The store clerk was looking at me
like I just murdered his Chihuahua
with a sledgehammer
and then ate it.